Who has ‘main character syndrome’: Donnalyn or your typical Apple user?


It’s all about “me-me-me” nowadays (not the 100 Gecs song) — it’s about people with main character syndrome, but some say that Apple users are just as pompous as Donnalyn. Is that true? We’ll find out.

What do you mean by main character syndrome?

It’s a phenomenon where a person makes any topic or question all about him/her. It is typically found among narcissists or influencers who just can’t get enough of themselves (e.g. Rendon Labador, Kakaibabe) — invalidating other people’s experiences and instead imposing their ‘I-have-experienced-worse-times-so-sit-down’ moments, leading to alienation and looking like a ‘whiney baby’ even though expressing it is valid.

Our Kakaibabe in action
Apple users, apparently

Where does a typical Apple user come in contact with this?

Well, they associate an Apple user with having ‘main character syndrome’ because of alleged instances of looking down on Android users or feeling above anybody else just because they have the latest Apple device. Of course, this is debatable and very broad. While it may be true, not all Apple users are like that– but there’s only one Donnalyn Kakaibabe Bartolome.

Donnalyn ‘Kakaibabe’FACTORSTypical Apple user
A full blown kanto-themed birthday
party with tutong cake
How they celebrate
their birthdays?
Definitely not a manufactured
‘kanto’ themed party with tutong cake
“Ako ho dati ay hamak na tagahugas
lamang, pero nag-ipon ako at
nakipaglaro sa sistema,be thankful ka sa cherry lobat mo now”
Do they validate
feelings?
Maybe will lowkey flex their
Apple device to you but never
invalidate your feelings
whatsoever
Donnalyn: “Me, Myself, and I”
P.S. And also how great she is at
winning life
yaasss kween
What do they
post on
social media?
Maybe some food porn,
a picture or two of their dogs or cats, maybe a scenery but never
about them all the time
Half-assed apology followed by
even more lowkey humble bragging
What happens
when they screw up?
Apologize and move on,
like a mature person
“selfies with me”Reasons they have an iPhoneBecause of simplicity, durability,
OS support, cameras, battery life
“more selfies with me”Reasons they might
have an Android device
Customization, freedom, jailbreak
potential, fun designs
YesKakaibabe?No
Kakaibabe kakaibabe kakaibabe
Kakaibabe kakaibabe kakaibabe
0nline seacut dahil…Mostly because of photography or
being a creative person
Definitely may main character syndromeVERDICTMukha lang may main character syndrome

At least the Apple user has some decency to act like a normal human being with class, as opposed to what Donnalyn is doing right now. She should swallow it (which she did, good job though), improve herself, and next time, try to be an actual good-natured influencer. It’s not too late to cure you of the highly contagious main-character syndrome.

DISCLAIMER: This is a satirical article, this piece doesn’t reflect the opinions of Vince Domingo, Donnalyn, and every Apple user ever. This is the sole opinion of the writer.

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